Panic!

Sat in the office, simple phone call to make. Total panic sets in! Hands shaking, short of breath. Dropped the phone, computer screen just a blur. Everything seemed to pulse in and out and I just couldn’t think straight.

Nothing has really gone well for a couple of days, trouble with my desktop computer and my laptop. These things should just work and be computers! Conversations with staff have been jumbled, either I am not explaining myself properly or they are idiots! 

Funnily enough this morning I was actually quite proud of my self thinking, despite the sheer volume of work building up I am actually coping quite well. Then this, boom! 

Have sat back and tried to control my breathing and reached for my blog. Hands are still shaking a bit but I am a little calmer. I can hear the noises from the kitchen down stairs, the clicking of China, the radio playing, nothing really but right now I just want it to stop.

I just want the world to leave me alone so I can curl up in silence. 

It would be so easy to go downstairs and a have a beer or 7, but I won’t, I can’t and I mustn’t